Published: February 25, 2009 08:47 am      

Angie gives how-to lessons on being a redneck runner

I get a lot weird looks when I go running in the winter. Most people don’t think of running when it’s 20 degrees outside or having their entire body blanketed with a light layer of new fallen snow.

But sometimes you just get that urge — “I want to go running today.” There also is another motivation — July 25. This date marks the 35th anniversary of the Quad-City Times Bix 7. Seven miles of running in pulsating heat. Sounds like fun, huh? I look forward to this race all year; so, I train for it all year.

Cold weather and snow makes training a little more challenging. As I was lying in bed last night thinking of this column and what to write — I thought of one of my favorite comedians, Jeff Foxworthy. When I go for my Saturday runs I love to listen to him and the country music countdown. I always laugh when I listen to his redneck jokes.

People probably think I am a real nut since I have a dumb grin plastered on my face in the latter part of winter running in the snow. So that got me to thinking — I should come up with a top-10 list of ways you could be considered a redneck runner.

So here we go:

10. You are unable to feel your feet for 2 miles.

9. You start to use your mittens as a hankie (gross I know, but it works).

8. You have a strong attraction to the guy who came up with fleece running pants. (OK, so maybe I have lost a few brain cells running in the cold, too.)

7. You would like to hug the guy who came up with long underwear. (He has to be long gone by now!)

6. You start thinking to yourself, “I must be very dedicated or very stupid.”

5. You’re grateful road kill doesn’t smell bad yet.

4. You’re glad when you can start to feel your feet again.

3. Your cold, sweaty hair starts to freeze and get chunky — nice.

2. You feel a strong kinship to dogs sitting outside.

(And the one I am sure you have all been waiting for with a little bit of a

cringe)

1. Your face is so stiff that you can only manage baby talk for 30 minutes.

Well, that pretty much sums me up in a nutshell.

As I write this column, I will go off on other topics I’m sure, but I will keep a running log with miles I have completed for the week and total miles until July 25. This will be very interesting to me if nothing else. I don’t claim to be a fantastic runner by any means, but I enjoy it — that is the main thing. And I don’t plan to stop until my knees give out — or something like that.

Training for the Bix is a great goal to have as well as training for other races coming up locally. The 27th annual 4-mile Easter Seal/Children’s Therapy Center Run/Fun Walk is coming up Sunday, March 30. I have done this race for several years and it is a great course.

There are plenty of door prizes and raffles entrants can take a stab at too. There also are many tasty treats for runners after they are finished with the race. I salute the organizers for always making it a fun event as well as raising money for a worthy cause.

So get out there and take a whiff of that fresh air.



Angie Bicker is the lifestyles editor with the Clinton Herald. She has been with the Herald since 2001.